Allowing It To Flow Through Everything That She Does Healing and Adapting to Grief and Loss: Sacred Spaces

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Healing and Adapting to Grief and Loss: Sacred Spaces

Connecting with loved ones who are no longer with us is an important part of healing and adapting to the grief and loss in our lives. There are many ways we can establish and maintain relationships, but equally important is finding a meaningful space—a sacred space to do so. There may be one or there may be many, but the ‘right’ place for you is the one that fits your lifestyle, your belief system and speaks to your heart with a simple ahhh, this is it.

A sacred space is where there is nothing but yourself and around you, within you and within you. Where you can be nothing or everything, you can only give but receive where you can let peace, strength and connection flow through you and nourish your soul.

Here are some of my holy places

* A rocky area overlooking the sea – I often walk along the beach. There is something about being by the sea, that I find incredibly beautiful and peaceful. Sometimes, I will sit on a rock and look at the bottomless sea. Being there automatically puts me in a more tender place.

There are fewer distractions and when I look up at the sky I wonder what has been here and gone. My loved ones become uppermost in my thoughts. I quieted my mind to reflect, to allow, to connect. That time in nature means I too can benefit from the healing powers of such an environment. I can freely breathe whatever it gives me. Allowing me to really touch his space in many ways.

* My Home Sanctuary – This can be a room that is peaceful or quiet and good to be in. It can also be a special table or bench for you to display a memento of your loved one. A place of remembrance and connection. Photos, flowers, candles, angels, favorite toys, personal items, spiritual texts…many items or very little.

Recently I had the honor of sharing someone else’s suffering and inviting them into their home. Without exception they had a special area where they could go and connect with their loved one. Each was displayed with special mementos to recognize what that person meant to them.

I have them too, one in my office where I am every day and one by my bedside. It can be a comforting place that accompanies us in our everyday world.

* The serenity of a cathedral – I always find walking around a beautiful old church or cathedral a truly peaceful and serene experience. There is something about the feel, smell, and glory of the sublime rooftops in these places that instantly connects me to my spiritual self. Being there takes me somewhere other than everyday. Somewhere I can open my heart and feel a sense of connection with those I have lost grow deeper in my soul.

Most of the time, I want to sit in silence in a cathedral or church and soak up whatever I can in the vault of peace and quiet. Even now, going forward I will enter a church and sit for a few minutes or so and connect with myself and my beautiful significant other, as I did recently in Sydney.

* Path with Heart – Labyrinths – I have always been fascinated by the symbolism of labyrinths and was delighted when I came across a native stone labyrinth in a natural shrub garden near my home. I visited it often and walked the winding path that led me into its center and out again. It was surprisingly quiet.

The last time I walked it was really amazing. It’s very hard to explain but when I was there it was like Stuart was too, there was no separation. I used to sit down and write when I was on the road and even today the writing of those days seems to carry with me.

Mazes are growing in popularity, if you can find one near you, give it a try. They have been described as ancient paths of wisdom and peace. My experience with them has been profound.

* Memorial site – I recently spent a few days in the area where my daughter placed the cross on the side of the road. It changed over the years. New growth has grown around the tree and the cross itself is tarnished and weathered from the elements. It is in a remote location, where the wind blows through the trees in silence. Being there is a powerful experience for me. It provides an instant sense of connection but also remembrance, love and sharing.

Visiting a place where a loved one has died or is remembered can be a very sacred place.

Centuries ago there were and still are only cemeteries, now there are many more. Niche walls, roadside monuments, mass memorial walls and memorial sculptures. There are many of us who set up online memorial sites or Facebook pages dedicated to our loved ones. The importance of connecting and remembering is something that allows us to grieve and heal. Visiting memorial sites allows us to do this in a tangible way.

Find your sacred space for suffering and allow peace, strength and connection to flow through you and nourish your soul.

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